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JOE DIFFIE lyrics - Mr. Christmas

Leroy The Redneck Reindeer

Original and similar lyrics
Well you've all heard the story About Rudolph and his nose Well I'll tell you a Christmas ale That never has been told Well you may think you've heard it all But you ain't heard nothin' yet About that crazy Christmas That the North Pole can't forget Rudolph was under the weather And had to call in sick So he got on the horn To his cousin Leroy Who lived out in the sticks He said Santa's really counting on me And I hate to pass the buck Leroy said Hey I'm on my way And he jumped in his pick-up truck When Leroy got to the North Pole All the reindeer snickered and laughed They never seen a deer in overalls And a John Deer tractor hat Well Santa stepped in And said just calm down Cuz we all got a job to do Like it or not Leroy's in charge And he's gonna be leading you And it was (chours) Leroy The Redneck Reindeer Hooked to the front of the sleigh Delivering toys to all the good ol' boys And girls along the way He's just a down home party animal Two Steppin all across the sky He mixes jingle bells with the rebel yell And made history that night Before that night was over Leroy had changed there tune He had them scootin a hoof On every single roof By the light of a neon moon Santa wrapped his bag with the dixie flag He was having the time of his life You could here him call Merry Chistmas Ya'll And all of ya'll a goodnight And it was Leroy The Redneck Reindeer Hooked to the front of the sleigh Delivering toys to all the good ol' boys And girls along the way He's just a down home party animal Two Steppin all across the sky He mixes jingle bells with the rebel yell And made history that night He mixes Jingle Bells with the rebel yell And made history that night

Judgement Of The Moon And Stars (Ludwig's Tune)

JONI MITCHELL "For The Roses"
No tongue in the bell And the fishwives yell But they might as well be mute So you get to keep the pictures That don't seem like much Cold white keys under your fingers Now you're thinking That's no substitute It just don't do it Like the song of a warm, warm body Loving your touch In the court they carve your legend With an apple in its jaw And the women that you wanted They get their laughs Long silk stockings On the bedposts of refinement You're too raw They think you're too raw It's the judgement of the moon and stars Your solitary path Draw yourself a bath Think what you'd like to have For supper Or take a walk A park A bridge A tree A river Revoked but not yet cancelled The gift goes on In silence In a bell jar Still a song ... You've got to shake your fists at lightning now You've got to roar like forest fire You've got to spread your light like blazes All across the sky They're going to aim the hoses on you Show 'em you won't expire Not till you burn up every passion Not even when you die Come on now You've got to try If you're feeling contempt Well then you tell it If you're tired of the silent night Jesus, well then you yell it Condemned to wires and hammers Strike every chord that you feel That broken trees And elephant ivories Conceal

Jingle Bells

Kelly Family
Jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride In Santas Christmas sleigh hey Jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride In Santas Christmas sleigh Dashing through the night In a wonderous christmas sleigh Round the world he goes Laughing all the way There high up in the skies You see his reindeer climb As this jolly gentleman Sings his merry rhyme hey Jengle bells... White hair and beard in wind And frost bit cheeks and nose With twinkly eyes big belly laugh Red and white his clothes Dashing house to house To childrens wild delight Dear Santa flies from north to south To every light tonight hey Jingle bells... Down your chimney he glides His reindeer makes no sound He fills and light your christmas tree And up again he bounds Dear Santa laugh with glee To see his magic pack The more he gives to every child The bigger the bag on his sack hey Jengle bells...

Christmas In My Hometown

Pride, Charley
There's a white Christmas in my hometown Where the streets are snowy, shining bright And the lights so on all the Christmas trees are burning For old Santa's sure to come this very night There are jingle bells and Christmas carols singin' By the children who are walking in the street Folks are smilin' and they're sayin' merry Christmas For there's joy in their hearts as they meet Oh, the Christmas chimes are ringing in the tower Jingle bells can be heard all around Time for all to go and wait for Santa's commin' 'Cause it's merry Christmas here in my hometown I can hear the reindeer in the distance All the sleighbells are ringing loud and clear Little eyes are closed in their slumber They are waiting for old Santa to appear Oh, the Christmas chimes are ringing in the tower Jingle bells can be heard all around Time for all to go and wait for Santa's commin' 'Cause it's merry Christmas here in my hometown

Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer

Cledus T. Judd "Cledus Navidad"
Well a couple of good friends of mine Elmo and Patsy Wrote me and said they'd written the perfect country Christmas comedy song. I said No you didn't. You didn't mention nothing about... ... ... ... Well...yeah you pretty much got it all. I mean Grandma and of course the family and getting drunk and run over by heavy machinery and... Well since I needed the money I felt obliged to include it on this record. And it goes a little something like this: R: Grandma got runned over by a reindeer Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as Santa, But as for me and Grandpa, we believe. She'd been drinkin' too much eggnog, And we'd begged her not to go. But she'd left her medication, So she stumbled out the door into the snow. When they found her Christmas mornin', At the scene of the attack, There were hoof prints on her forehead, And incriminatin' Claus marks on her back. R: Grandma got runned over by a reindeer Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. (On her way home) You can say there's no such thing as Santa, (Say there's no Santa) But as for me and Grandpa, we believe. (Lord, we believe) Now we're all so proud of Grandma, He's been takin' this so well. See him in there watchin' football, Drinkin beer and playin' cards with cousin Belle. It's not Christmas without Grandma. All the family's dressed in black. And we just can't help but wonder: Should we open up her gifts or send them back? R: Grandma got runned over by a reindeer Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. (Midnight before Christmas) You can say there's no such thing as Santa, (Say there's no Santa) But as for me and Grandpa, we believe. (Lord, we believe) Now the goose is on the table And the pudding made of fig. And a blue and silver candle That would have just matched the hair in grandma's wig. I've warned all my friends and neighbors. Better watch out for yourselves. They should never give a license, To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves. R: Grandma got runned over by a reindeer Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. (Minding her own business) You can say there's no such thing as Santa, (What do you mean there's no Santa?) But as for me and Grandpa, we believe. (Lord, we believe) Oh As for me and Grandpa, we believe. (We believe in Santa Claus.)

Bad, Bad Leroy Brown

JERRY REED "Mind Your Love"
Well the south side of Chicago is the baddest part of town And if you go down there you better just beware of a man they call Leroy Brown Now Leroy's more than trouble you see he stands only bout six foot four All the downtown ladies they call him Treetop Lover all the men they just call him sir And it's bad bad Leroy Brown The baddest man in the whole damn town Badder than old King Kong And meaner than a junkyard dog Now Leroy he's a gambler and he really likes his fancy clothes He likes to wear his damned diamond rings on his fingers under everybody's nose He got a custom Continental he's got a Eldorado too He got a .32 gun in his pocket just for fun and a razor blade in his shoe And he's bad bad Leroy Brown... Now Friday night bout a week ago Leroy shootin' some dice And at the edge of the bar sat a gal named Doris and ooh that girl looked nice Well he cast his eyes upon her and the trouble it soon began Ol' Leroy Brown he learned a lesson bout messin' with the wife of a jealous man And he's bad bad Leroy Brown... Well the two men squared off and took to fightin' and when they pulled 'em both offa the floor Ol' Leroy looked like a jigsaw puzzle with a couple of pieces gone And he's bad bad Leroy Brown... And he's bad bad Leroy Brown...

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