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[Hook 1 - Will.I.Am & Jimmy Fallon:] Seriously? Look at her butt. Ew! Oh, she looks like a slut. Ew! I’m like “what the what”? Ew! Right? Right? Ew, ew! Oh, you got to see this Oh my gross I can't believe it She’s so basically basic She’s literally making me sick This is embarrassing. Ew, ew! Like seriously, seriously. Ew, ew! No, seriously, seriously! Ew, ew! I can’t, I can’t! Ew, ew! [Verse 1 - Will.I.Am & Jimmy Fallon:] Look at look at this. OM-effin-G, what the eff? You're gonna freakin' flip, like, seriously freakin' flip Cause Sally's mad at Iggy because Iggy's booty's more biggy And Sally's booty's twiggy so she called her friend Cybie Now Sally's gonna get impleggies What's impleggies? Implants, silly. Ew! I'm freakin' for real I think silicone butts are ew, ew! [Hook 2 - Will.I.Am & Jimmy Fallon:] Where’d she get that outfit? Ew That girl is totally ratchet. Ew! No, seriously – who likes that? Ew! Right right? Ew, ew! Look at the way she takes pics And what's up with those duck lips? She's so lame Super lame. Ew, ew! This is embarrassing. Ew, ew! Like seriously seriously. Ew, ew! No, seriously seriously. Ew, ew! Oh my gosh. Ew, ew! [Bridge - Will.I.Am:] I am not hating I am merely conversating With my BFF Sara So bust your rhyme, Sara... [Verse 2 - Jimmy Fallon & Will.I.Am:] It’s Mir.I.Am and you know who Now here’s some things I think are ew! FaceTime and reclining in Airplane seats and then Vining Retweeting tweets I'm not lying Cause even rhyming's ann-iy-ing! Bread bowls and ravioli Casserole, a roly poly Caterpillar on my really old And moldy windowsill. Ew! Trapper keepers and a creeper wearin’ Sneakers with the toes And maybe Frozen cause You knowin’ I don't Wanna build a snowman. Ew, ew! Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew! Hello my name is Sara That's Sara with no "H" Too bad if you don't like it Cause haters gonna Hate my Stepdad Gary He tries to act so cool Every time we see him My friends and I say "Ew!" [Outro - Stepdad Gary, Will.I.Am & Jimmy Fallon:] Hey funky bunch, what're you guys doing? Oh my gosh, it's my step dad Gary And he just ruined it! I heard that funky beat that you was playing down here It's a party over here It's a party over here Ew!

How Can You Expect To Be Taken Seriously?

PET SHOP BOYS "Behavior"
You live upon a stage, and everyone's agreed You're the brightest hope by far that anyone can see So when you take the limelight you can guarantee You're gaining fame and claiming credibility Tell me baby are you gonna get high as a kite Tell me baby are you gonna let it happen every night How can you expect to be taken seriously You live within the law, and everyone assumes You must find this a bore, and try something new You're an intellectual giant, an authority To preach and teach the whole world about ecology Tell me baby are you gonna make any other claim Tell me baby are you gonna take any of the blame How can you expect to be taken seriously How can you expect to be taken seriously (Seriously) (Seriously) You live within the headlines, so everyone can see You're supporting every new cause and meeting royalty You're another major artist on a higher plane Do you think they'll put you in the Rock'n'Roll Hall of Fame Tell me baby how you generate longevity Tell me baby how you really hate publicity How can you expect to be taken seriously How can you expect to be taken seriously Seriously (seriously) Seriously, aah (Do you have a message for your fans) How can you expect to be taken seriously How can you expect to be taken seriously (Seriously) Seriously (Seriously) Seriously Aah, seriously

WTF Collective 2

JON LAJOIE "I Kill People"
MC Confusing back in this bitch With a parking sandwich and a chicken ticket I got a liquid face lift from a fig with big tits And my wrist got twisted by a Brit with fake spit And you don't understand it, 'cause you're not supposed to Like a candy cane snake in a jealous cartoon And I'm gonna leave soon, but first I need to Drink a Chevy chase face and rape Robocop 2 Yo, I'm MC Historical Inaccuracy I drop lyrical bombs like Hiroshima in '73 I write rhymes like Shakespeare when he wrote Ann Frank's Diary Which is about the civil war of 1812 in Germany I'm like the Spanish inquisition when they killed Jesus And Abe Lincoln's suicide was the theme for my thesis Like Moses when I focus I can split the Red sea Like he did in 1950 with the Chinese army I'm MC Don't Know How to Pluralize Word I got so many rhyme and I sleep with all the girl When there's more than one of something you're supposed to pluralize But I never learned that through all the year I've been alive Hello, I'm MC Canadian Stereotype I'm about to get started, so let me get off the ice But I don't want any trouble, and I am always polite Now let's hop on my snowmobile, and I will tell you what I like But first I'll turn of curling and turn down Avril Lavigne Et j'vais dire une phrase en francais, parce qu'ici on est bilingue Oh boy, I fell of my igloo and I hurt my knee Let's go to the hospital, don't worry, here in Canada it's free, eh MC Fatigue, did you miss me I'll be awake for five minutes, 'cause I had a coffee I'll try to get through my verse, but I really don't know I drank that coffee about five minutes ago (snoring) They hired me again to sing this motherfucking chorus I haven't found a fucking job yet so I gotta do this bullshit (I can't take it, I'm done) I don't think I can sing another fucking chorus I think I'm gonna jump off a bridge, or shoot myself like Kurt Cobain did (I think my dad has a gun) I'm MC Knows Too Many Facts About Bees 15 miles per hour is their average speed A queen can lay up to 3000 eggs in a day Just because I know a lot about bees doesn't mean that I'm gay I'm also MC In the Closet Homosexual I hide it 'cause it's easier to be heterosexual We can't even get married in most states here in America It's fucked up Gay marriage is legal here, in Canada I'm MC Homophobic Fucking Asshole Being gay is evil and it is unnatural Jesus said to love thy neighbour, but only if they are straight Penises go in vaginas, anything else is just insane I'm MC Extremely Inappropriate Rhymes I shake things up like J-fox when I get on the mic And I drop my enemies just like Christopher Reeves' horse Then I put them to sleep, like Heath Ledger of course (woah) I'm MC Extremely Politically Correct I disagree with the previous MC's lyrical content It's offensive, insensitive and in very bad taste Just like that guy who wrote that song when Michael Jackson passed away Yo, MC Final Verse here to end this song One was enough, we didn't need a sequel Jon Make a fourth Show Me Your Genitals or another Normal Guy But for now let's end this stupid song with a suicide This is the last time that I will ever sing a chorus My dad's gun was in his closet and I'm gonna end this bullshit (I had a good run) I'm gonna pull the trigger as soon as I finished the chorus Sayonara and farewell, I guess I'll see you all in hell (Four, three, two, one)

WTF Collective 3

Yo... MC confusing... WTF 3 mother fuckers. Got more hamstrings than a pile of wings 2012 - Bringing west wing DVDs to a blind date First on deck every day normal guy [everyday normal guy Everyday normal guy here to get the track started My average lyrics are between genius and retarded I drink tap water and watch all the CSIs I put my 30 dollar pants on on leg at a time Sleep 8 hours a night eat 3 meals a day I'm motherfucking content I got no reason to complain I have a roof over my head and I got clothes on my back My verse is done it wasn't great but hey it wasn't that bad [MC uses time machines irresponsibly] Yo I'm MC uses time machines irresponsibly Went back and found Jusad Iscariot in 33 AD Gave him 31 pieces of silver to rat out the wrong guy Then I planted monsanto seeds in dinosaur times Gave Bill Gates my iPhone in 1973 Then I travelled in time to the night that I was concieved Then I met up with my parents and we hung out all night Come to think of it they didn't have any alone time (NO) [MC nausious] MC Nausious up in this mother fucker I don't feel so hot shit I think that I am gonna [bluurg] Why'm I so sick, what I eat Cat food will make expired yogurt taste less like cheese (oh right) [MC cock blocks himself] MC cock blocks himself, hey girl what's up You so sexy we should probably hook up Crawl in a hot tub with a bottle of champagne By the way I have a girlfriend and I think I might have AIDS [MC necrophiliac] MC necrophiliac, where are my dead bodies at Crashing funerals just so that I can get a whiff of that Decomposing bodies are (they're[?]) my favourite aphrodesiac Flatlining gives me a pavlovian erection in my pants Turn-offs include breathing pulses and signs of life My turn ons are rigor mortis cold flesh and suicide If you're not stiff as a board I won't be stiff and I'll be bored Wait what do we have here? Looks like I'm about to score [Talking, Zombie chorus guy] Wait a minute... no! no!!! NO!!! [singing] -You have to be kidding me What the fuck is going on -This cannot be happening I don't wanna do this any more -This must be a bad dream Leave me alone -Why am I still singing? I mother fucking killed myself [MC gets sidetracked easily] Yo! MC gets sidetracked easily back in the heezy By heezy I mean house but not the show I think it's cheezy My favourite show is Dexter that guy is also in 6 feet- under my first experience with death I was just 16 My dog got run over by a truck and its head exploded Like Robert Patrick in Terminator 2 when he's frozen Its freezing in Iceland I was just there on holiday Hold on I think I got lost again what was I trying to say? [MC who couldn't speak in the present tense] I was MC who couldn't speak in the present tense I'm gonna have a lot of money and my dick was immense It would've been difficult, people assumed I was a retard I'll have a serious problem, communicating was hard [MC constipation] Yo I'm MC constipation It has been 3 days since My last bowell movement I'm starting to get impatient Spend hours on the toilet Yet nothing never comes out of it Intestines like polititions They're constantly full of shit I wish my bowell movements where a little more like my rhymes Always smooth and free-flowing It would save me a lot of time Push for hours with no result Not even a brown brussel sprout My shit's like a gay republican It's not planning on coming out [MC] Yo I'm MC invisible You can't see me The only rapper in this industry that can't be seen With the naked eye I won't lie It's hard to get a fanbase When image is everything And I litterally don't have a face [MC on the phone with Ted Danson] I'm MC on the phone with Ted Danson Keep it down Just skip to the next verse I'm on the phone with ted Danson Not now hold on ted I don't wanna be in this song anymore Leave me alone This is more important I'm on the phone with the guy who played Sam Malone [MC confusing] Yo MC confusing wrapping up the song Like a plasticine high fiving (high five and) a helicopter thong I got richochet highlitghts from the fleet fox's knife guy We out like a rice fightin' a vampire's wife's life [MC zombie chorus guy] -Maybe this isn't so bad Better than my last job -Taking it in the ass for cash 20 bucks a pop -Maybe things will turn around Being a zombie's pretty cool -Things couldn't get worse anyhow (get's tackled by MC necrophiliac) [Talking] [MC necrophiliac:] Yeah that's right uuhh. [undoing fly/zipper] Oh you're gonna get it you little dead bitch. [Chorus Guy:] No! No! Ahh! [getting raped] ow ow, I spoke to soon [MC WCSITPT:] UUGH! That used to be so gross! [MC Nausious:] It's just a guy having sex with a dead body. There's nothing (BLURG) [MC invisible:] Dude! you just puked all over me! [MC Nausious:] sorry [MC constipation:] That's a good idea, I should get an enema [MC cock-blocks himself:] Enemas, puke, guys having sex with dead bodies... you ready to go back to my place ([girl:] uugh (walks off)) What am I doing wrong? [MC fatigue: (wakes up)] Did I miss anything?

Cock It

JUVENILE "Juve The Great"
[Juvenile] Uh Huh, Uh Huh Mic check one, two it's Juvenile coming through Uh Uh c'mon, c'mon [Verse 1] Who the man if I ain't it nigga can't claim it I can take a small name and make it famous I reason with no one homie I got fa sho cliental I'm a XL out here in the streets or lyin in jail I'm quick tempored please limit ya words I will send you in a hurry down south with the splurge it's kind of hard to understand me cause I speak with a slur but my guns speak a language all the people done heard streets sense gon' keep me in it for a minute you fuckin with a general salute me lieutenant I'm not too particular with lies I look e'm in there eyes say a pray before you die this ain't about me this about somethin thats spoke you know runnin with a nigga while you cuttin his throat oh them loose lip bitches get hung from a rope you know bagged up and throwed off the side of a boat, oh! [Chorus - repeat 2X] Cock it, take berrata then pop it give me that out ya pocket cause the best can't stop it East coast whassup, Down south whassup West coast whassup, Mid West whassup [Verse 2] Keep on makin ya laws, I'm a keep breaking them I can move a package in any city I'm stationed in if ya son touchin my shit you better pray for him bust his head and catch me a flight to where the hatreds been I ain't the only solider they got alot of these all of these children make me know who dropped alot of seeds I smoke till my eyes shut stay strapped so if you think about sneakin you better wise up hit you with the traqualizer let it fill ya head paralyze you have ya screamin 'I can't feel my legs' regardless of what a nigga or a bitch done said the shell around ya get poked like eggs I'm from the M-A-G-N-O-L-I-A my bitches gonna listen to what the hell I say you niggas gonna respect it or get out my way or the coroner's gonna happen to ya all time sake [Chorus] [Verse 3] You old niggas on ya last limb move over let some niggas who really want it come cash in suppose to get killed for cock blockin in cells solider bet you can't get no chronic up in hell fresh off the porch where the stash spot I'm hungry tryna get the same respect that my Dad got got the chopper cut the wieght, nice in the stash box nigga be on paper so himmed up from the bad cops how the hoes be actin hopin for child support I need to snatch me a coat and endorse it with dope I ain't even gotta speak on it I put my G on it niggas gon' let us get that whenever we want it beef is beef whenever the shit occurs if it's real it's gon' resolve into metal for sure but hit the right one he ain't respectin my bad my only satisfaction will be poppin your ass [Chorus - till end]


Lookin back at my background tryin' to figure out how I ever got here. Some things are stil a mystery to me While others are much to clear. I'm just livin' in the sunshine, Stay contented most of the time. Yeah, listenin to Murphy, Walker and Willis, Sing me their Texas rhymes. Now most of the people who retire in Florida are wrinkled and they lean on a crutch. And mobile homes are smotherin' my keys; Well I hate those bastards so much. I wish a summer squall would blow them all the way up to fantasy land. They're ugly and square, they don't belong here. They look a lot better as beer cans. [Chorus:] Yeah, That's why it's still a mystery to me, Why some people live like they do. So many nice things happening out there, Never even seen the clues. Whoa, but we're doin' fine, we can travel and rhyme. I know we've been doing our part. Got a Caribbean soul I can barely control and some Texas hidden here in my heart. Well now, I might have joined the merchant marine, If I hadn't learned how to sing. And on top of that I got married too early, And it cost me much more than a ring. But those crazy days are over, You've just got to learn from the wrong things you've done. I came off the rebound, started looking around, Figured out it's time to have a little fun. [Chorus] Well now, if I ever live to be an old man, I'm gonna sail down to Martinique. I'm gonna buy me a sweat stained Bogart suit and an African parakeet. And then I'll sit him on my shoulder and open up my trusty old mind. I'm gonna teach him how to fuss, Teach him how to cuss, And pull the cork out of a bottle of wine. [Chorus] Yeah, I got a Caribbean soul I can barely control and some Texas hidden here in my heart.

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